Why is he like this??

Four nights now. He has gone downstairs to sleep on the couch. There is always a reason, supposedly. One night it was that he just could not sleep. Another night it was because our son crawled into bed with us. Another night it was because I had my reading light on. He is the one that got me the reading light; did he expect me not to use it?? I have no idea what last nights reason was as he was gone before I went downstairs this morning. I found that he destroyed the entire living room to make a bed on the floor and then left it for me to clean up. I do not know why he always does this! Look, I know that his mother waited on him hand and foot until he left home and she still does it when he goes to her apartment but he is not a child anymore. A man in his thirties should not still have to be taken care of. He does not know how to do laundry, cook, do dishes, or anything else a man of his age should know how to do. When he eats he walks away from the dirty dishes. When I am not home he always leaves glasses of soda, juice, etc. laying everywhere and then proceeds to get mad at ME when I get home because the toddler spilled everything. How can I pick up his glasses if I am not home???? Unfortunately I am seeing that my sons are now refusing to do anything. They see their father doing nothing and that I have to do everything so they are learning that a man does nothing and the woman does everything. I just do not know what to do anymore. GAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!